Why is he dating if he not ready for a relationship

I have been dating a guy for just over three weeks. We were both upfront with our intentions from the start both want a long term relationship and have similar goals eg travelling, starting a family. Organising to catch up can be difficult because he works early and very long hours which leaves him exhausted by the night…. We slept together on the fourth date which I initiated but afterwards I regretted as I thought that I had rushed things.

We communicate mainly through txt and he messages me several times everyday to check in and ask how I am. We may go a couple of days without seeing each other and he will let me know he misses me and is keen to catch up soon as possible.

He introduced me to his parents and I have had dinner and stayed over. He had admitted that he really likes me and is happy with our dating progress so far. Sounds great so far right? Or make more effort? I am worried I am over investing my time and emotions into this and worried about it not working out…. Everyone says to take it slow and take it a day at a time, which I am trying to do but seem to be stressing a lot. I tried talking to other guys at the same time and keeping my options open, trying not to focus on just one guy but that only made me feel guilty as I know this guy is only seeing me.

I came out of a long term relationship recently and not in any hurry to be committed but I also do not want to go wasting my time. Can anyone relate or give share a similar dating story? What Kindra says is true. I am a guy and I agree.

If I am interested in someone, heck believe this, I will move fast with them. Serious men who like you will not worry about moving fast if they really like you. Of course there are sly characters out there who will want to move fast for other reasons but the average honest guy that wants to move fast is a good sign for women.

People who value moving slow, please convince me of one thing: You meet the person of your dreams, feel attracted to them physically and like their personality and would still keep telling that person that you want to move slowly?

Please stop the BS. That is simply not true. If I tell someone I want to move slowly it basically means I may be checking out other people or I am communicating with others or at least seeing them or I am not ready for a relationship.

Jake January 1, So I am a guy who you could say is a little more sensitive than others. I am the kind of guy that goes out of his way to make a girl feel special. People have made suggestions that I stop looking and let the girls come to me. I could definitely use some advice on how to not get so emotionally invested and take things slower. Gian December 13, I met this girl. She was the first one i truly loved. We met at a bar drinking with friends and i noticed this one person who wasnt drinking much.

I asked what was the problem. She said she doest drink that much. I asked if she wanted to eat and we did. We were still students at the time so i rqn out of money. She offered to buy me a hotdog for dinner. It was nice of here to do that. She started giving interest to me. I started taking notice.

My life came to a stop as i thought is this a chance for love?. She was courted by many guys. I offered to repel them by pretending to be in a relationship. This could be a real chance.

So i took a leap of faith and asked. The first months were hard. I cheated on her two times. Im sorry for that. But then when everything happened. There i realized something else. The one girl i can truly love. Heck im madly in love with her right now. I promise to take it slow because she said she wasnt ready.

Now we are on the brink of a collapse. We had a cool off and now she wants to break off. I couldnt just let her off like that? Her land lady seems interested in breaking us apart. But i dont give a care for them. I dont love them.

The only one i care about. Kristine December 5, Lvh, I hope you left him. He is an abusive person and if you stay with him you will regret it. He is a classic example…everything he did and how he acts is whatbyou should benlooking for and avoid. Tell him to buzz off. He is not damaged goods because of his past. It is because he is rotten in the present and seems to have the potential to be pure evil in the future. He brings up his past to lure you in.

You did nothing wrong. You cannot fix him or save him. Life is too short and there are too many fish in the sea. Kindra November 30, Maybe everyone is different but this is my experience… As a woman, when men moved fast, it was always a good thing because they knew what they wanted. All of my serious relationships moved swiftly. And when it moved slow, it was always a bad sign. The slow moving men were still in love with their exes, were emotionally unavailable and scared of commitment, or were dating lots of women and just completely unsure about me in general.

People seem to think that moving slow helps you to learn more about someone but it does not. Even a slow moving guy will still hide stuff.

If anything, I hid more the slower it went. Maybe its a personality thing. But from experience, you want the guys who are moving fast. Those men know what they want. Hot and heavy the first 2 weeks. He saw me during the week, took me dancing,nice dinners, brought me flowers. He wanted to give me a key to his condo a week after we met. He gave me his passwords to computer, phone, etc. He wanted me to move in a month later. I see change after 2nd week, he wants me to come to his house during week, he works some weekends.

He still texts a lot, says he loves me on 2nd week. He became cold, uncaring, wall up. He admits he does that. I end up apologizing, we had good time. Next week, he has plans to take me out officially for birthday weekend. He goes ballistic saying he called, I showed no missed calls.

I sent him my phone history. He asked if I was seeing someone else, I must not care, etc. We ended up going, after he calmed down. His wall goes up, he brings me home. I ask if we can forget this, have a good day? Tomorrow will be better, I need to sleep on it and we will go to brunch maybe. His ex is getting alimony and he despises her.


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